Creepshow (1982)

Directed by George A. Romero.  Written by Stephen King.  Starring Leslie Nielsen, Ted Danson, Adrienne Barbeau, Ed Harris and Stephen King.

Plot: 5 tales of terror are presented, inspired by the comics of the 50’s

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“Happy Father’s Day”

Sort of pointless.  Everyone was a dick.  Ignorant children, including the one who killed her father, come together every year for Father’s Day.  They even have a cake.  But this year, things end up a little different.  Although we didn’t really like the story, we did jump once.

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“The Lonesome Death of Jordy Verrill”

Stephen does well as Jordy, a hick who finds and cracks open a meteorite which ultimately leads to his death.  No spoiler there.  Check out the title.  This story is gross though and tragic.  There’s no justice.  It’s horrible.  We just feel bad for Jordy.

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“Something to Tide You Over”

Finally, a story worthy of Creepshow.  In this tale, Leslie Nielsen is an asshole who no longer loves his wife, but won’t let Ted Danson, who really does love her, have her.  As a matter of fact, he goes to great and disturbing lengths to make sure they aren’t ever happy.  But this story is good, so he gets his comeuppance.  It’s a great revenge story.

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“The Crate”

A college custodian finds an old crate underneath a stairwell.  Along with a professor, they decide to open it and to their shock, they find a “monster” inside.  We ended up rooting for the monster, too, which was easy since the story followed rules and had surprisingly good Freddy Claws.  I really liked this one and DJ loved it.

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“They’re Creeping Up On You”

This racist, clean freak, jerk is bombarded with cockroaches because that is vindication.  Still, this story is pretty disgusting.  Especially for DJ.  He does not do cockroaches.  So, it’s not exactly fun to watch even though he’s getting his.

The best story is “Something to Tide You Over”, but it doesn’t take our whole score much past mediocre.  This is what it is.  It’s an anthology that’s fun to waste a little time.  It’s not necessary for a horror fan to see, but we do recommend it.

Our score: 53/100.

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