Shark Night (2011)

Directed by David R. Ellis.  Written by Will Hayes and Jesse Studenberg.  Starring Sara Paxton, Dustin Milligan, Chris Carmack, Joshua Leonard, Donal Logue, Katharine McPhee, Joel David Moore and Chris Zylka.

Plot: a weekend at a lake house turns into a nightmare as a group of unsuspecting college students run into a mass of hungry sharks.


Sadly, this movie is not very good.  Mainly because the sharks aren’t actually the antagonists.  See, a group of college kids go to Hickville, USA where Sara (Paxton) used to live for a vacation.  They run into some locals at a gas station that know Sara, but aren’t very welcoming to her friends and even say racist things to the lone black guy and lone Hispanic girl (who just happen to be dating).  Fast forward some and the black guy gets attacked by a shark first and the locals (Logue, Leonard and Carmack) come to help.  But see, they don’t really want to help because it turns out that they’re the ones that put the sharks into the water in the first place.

Like, what?  Apparently it’s all for monetary gain, but it’s a loser motive.  The bad guys are just awful.  The rules suck.  The story is horrendous.  And somehow, SOMEHOW, there’s not one boob shot.  What the hell?!  Aside from the cast and the quality of the film, we have nothing good to say other than this – stay for the end of the credits.  There’s a post-credits cast rap song and it’s the best part of the movie.  You can actually just YouTube it if you want to save yourself the trouble of watching the whole movie.

Our score: 30.

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