Cursed (2005)

Directed by Wes Craven.  Written by Kevin Williamson.  Starring Christina Ricci, Joshua Jackson, Jesse Eisenberg, Milo Ventimiglia, Judy Greer, Mya, Shannon Elizabeth, Michael Rosenbaum, Portia de Rossi and Derek Mears.

Plot: a sister and brother are both attacked by the same werewolf.

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Usually, brother/sister type movies work well for me and DJ.  Especially ones with hot ass Joshua Jackson in them.  This is not one of those cases though.

Ellie (Ricci) and Jimmy (Eisenberg) are caring for each other now that their parents are dead, when a huge monkey wrench gets thrown into everything.  They are both attacked and slashed by a werewolf.  They start behaving in werewolfish ways – liking the smell of blood and the taste of raw meat for instance.  They also become stronger, but are they strong enough to kill the werewolf that cursed them before being stuck werewolves themselves forever.

This movie is comical in several parts, but mostly everything else is a mess.  We find Jimmy highly annoying until he becomes “cursed”.  The rules are all weird.  I mean, they have to remove the brain like it’s a goddamned zombie movie.  You never really see any death details.  Although the special effects are so lousy in parts, I’m not sure it would have helped.  But here’s the real rub…

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******SPOILER ALERT******

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Jake (Jackson) goes fucking crazy and is revealed to be the one who bit them.  He wants to kill Jimmy for some reason that’s never quite established to our liking.  I mean, I really just wanted the three of them to run off into the moon together.  I would have run off with Joshua Jackson.  So long as he wasn’t trying to kill my brother.  Me and DJ would like being werewolves I think.

Anyway, the movie isn’t good.  At least not as good as I wanted it to be.

Our score: 34.

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