The Amityville Horror (2005)

Directed by Andrew Douglas. Written by Scott Kosar. Starring Ryan Reynolds, Melissa George, Chloe Grace Moretz, Jesse James, Jimmy Bennett, Rachel Nichols and Philip Baker Hall.

Plot: a remake of the 1979 film of the same name, about a family who realizes their new home really is too good to be true.

In 1974, a young man murdered his entire family in grisly fashion in Amityville, New York. One year later, a young couple, George (Reynolds) and Kathy (George) Lutz move into that same house with Kathy’s three children from a previous marriage; Billy (James), Michael (Bennett) and Chelsea (Moretz). Soon enough, Chelsea is talking to a little girl no one else can see, their babysitter is being hospitalized and George is acting abusive towards everyone, even the dog. And might I just take a minute to discuss how in the original movie they had a dog that they not only loved, but that George ran back in to save at the end of it all. However, in this remake, they keep the dog outside most of the time and first chance George gets he axes the dog to death. UGH!!! So, tired of this new, dogmustdieineverymovie cliche.

What else are we tired of? The fact that in the original the kids weren’t dicks. And Kathy wasn’t such a pushover. And George (James Brolin in the original) wasn’t shirtless all the time. Not that I mind Ryan Reynolds shirtless, but I do mind watching him be an ass for 90 minutes and torture his family.

I loved the cast and DJ and I both thought the effects were great. And we didn’t mind the addition of a few jump/scares. But overall, this movie was severely lacking in comparison to the original version. The score suffered.

My score: 48. DJ’s score: 36.

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