Scream (2022)

Directed by Matt Bettinelli-Olpin and Tyler Gillett. Written by James Vanderbilt and Guy Busick. Starring Melissa Barrera, Jenna Ortega, Neve Campbell, Courteney Cox, David Arquette, Jasmin Savoy Brown, Mason Gooding, Kyle Gallner, Dylan Minnette, Mikey Madison, Jack Quaid, Heather Matarazzo, Marley Shelton and Skeet Ulrich.

Plot: another Ghostface killer comes after a new group of teenagers that are all linked, in some way, to the original murders.

Let’s start with the fact that we both think this movie is bad. Probably the worst one of the whole Scream family. I’m going to spoil it too, later on, so you can stop reading now if you want. Just know we hated this.

It all starts with Tara (Ortega) being attacked by a Ghostface and almost killed. Her sister, Sam (Barrera), who is a bit estranged from her, decides to come see Tara anyway, in Woodsboro, with her boyfriend, Richie (Quaid), in tow. At the hospital, we also meet Tara’s friends. There’s Chad (Gooding), his twin sister Mindy (Brown), Wes (Minnette) and Amber (Madison). When they meet Sam, some of them are angry with her for “abandoning” Tara. We didn’t honestly like anyone. Tara’s friends need to mind their own business. But then we find out more about Sam and we hated her, too.

Sam has secrets. She has visions of Billy Loomis (Ulrich) because, as it turns out, he’s her biological father. Tara, who is only her half-sister, finds this out and kicks Sam out of her hospital room. Stupid Tara. Why would you want to be alone when someone just tried to kill you? So of course, Ghostface comes after her then, too.

When Sam leaves, she and Richie go to see Dewey (Arquette), who is no longer with Gale (Cox) and seems drunk and depressed. He lays out the rules for them and then he even physically goes with them to try and help. What comes to light is that all of Tara’s friends are related to one of the original teenagers from Woodsboro. For example, Chad and Mindy’s mother is Randy’s sister (Matarazzo). Dun-Dun-Dunnnnnnn.

******SPOILER ALERT******



DJ only really liked Dewey and his old partner, Judy (Shelton), and Ghostface kills them both. Fuck it. As for me, I only liked Richie, and only a little, mainly because he wasn’t as deplorably pretentious as everyone else. However, I had a feeling that while the film killed Dewey it would make Richie Ghostface. And so it did. Fuck it. It didn’t even make any sense though. There were two killers of course, and the other one was Amber. Her and Richie loved horror movies, found each other online and decided to kill a bunch of people. Happens all the time.

The effects were the best part of it all. Everything else was poorly done. Here’s my rant: It’s unrealistic. Tara gets stabbed seven damn times, has her ankle broken, is attacked again, never has an asthma attack. But, on their way out of town to like, survive, she needs her inhaler so much so that they have to stop off for it. No. Just no. Freddy Claws was also not a thing at all. Everyone argued with everyone else. There were no boobs, the humor was flat and the rules (if you want to call them that) sucked. The whole premise was unsatisfactory and not fun. Like, the opposite of fun.

And since my rant is already too long, let me add another two things. One, I think it was just a little too pushy with how cool and relevant it was trying to be. All the references to really cool movies everyone in the world is supposed to like, was laughable. Excuse me that we’re just so uncool that we don’t like the same movies as everyone else. Excuse us for being our own individual selves. Two, I get the whole feminism stuff is in right now, but really? All six males died, but five of the seven females, who were all violently attacked, lived! Really? Now that’s some sexism right there. We don’t recommend this movie. At all.

My score: 17. DJ’s score: 12.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.