Triangle (2009)

horror, movies, reviews 4 Minutes

Written and directed by Christopher Smith.  Starring Melissa George and Liam Hemsworth.

Plot: Without revealing too much – because I will be later – it’s kinda about a group of “friends” who go sailing into a storm and after they capsize they end up boarding a creepy old ship that only appears to be deserted

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If you google this movie you’re bound to get a thousand different theories about what exactly was going on.  It was that kind of movie.  Often, I enjoy thinking-type movies.  I like to figure out exactly what’s going on, like with The Sixth Sense for example.  This movie was NOT The Sixth Sense though.  Meaning, the twist was not satisfactory, it wasn’t completely explained after it was revealed and there was absolutely NO resolution at the end.  And so this is where I spoil it.  Or at least I explain what I saw.  I’m not positive it’s what’s really going on.

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In the beginning single mother Jess (Melissa George), arrives at the docks to go on a boating trip with her friends.  During a storm their boat capsizes.  When the storm passes, they see a big ship and board it for safety.  But the ship is not safe.  It is already occupied by a masked killer and other versions of themselves, most of which are dead.  And when Jess is the only one left, a confrontation with the killer reveals that Jess herself is the killer. In fact, as the killer her, she tells the non-killer her to become the killer so that the whole thing will start over.  Then, the killer-her falls off the boat.  She washes ashore later.  She gets up and goes back home only to see another version of herself abusing her son.  Mad, she kills that version of herself, puts her in the trunk of her car and takes off with her son in the backseat.  But then the car is hit and her and her son are killed.  Somehow though, another version of herself is standing on a higher road, watching the scene from above.  A cab driver approaches her, offering her a ride.  She accepts, is taken to the harbor, gets on the same boat she got in before and the whole series of events begins happening again.

If you’re lost, so were we.  Like, what the hell?  Obviously, Jess is stuck in some sort of hellish time loop.  And let me tell you how little we like time loop movies that don’t fully explain themselves.  Many people have theories, the main one mentioning a Sisyphus situation.  In Greek mythology, Sisyphus was a king who was not an awesome guy and was eventually condemned to the Underworld where he would forever roll a gigantic rock uphill only to watch it roll back down again every time.  So, yeah, he was a jerk who was stuck in a futile loop of evil that was his own personal hell, but after he died he did NOT kill a bunch of people on a boat so that he could get back to the son he supposedly loved, but ultimately killed.  However, the Sisyphus theory is a good one and probably correct.  She does seem to be in her own personal hell.  And it even seems to me that the cab driver who interacts with her at the scene of the accident is either Charon (the ferryman of Hades that takes the newly deceased across the river Styx) or Hermes (the God of travelers and the guide to the Underworld) and is meant to be there every time, perhaps hoping that each time she’ll give up the repetition and admit the truth – that she is dead, that she killed her son and that this is her hell.

But WTF?!  I mean really, that is too much.  And for most people it’s gonna take some major Googling to figure a lot of that out.  I remember the story of Sisyphus from college, but I still had to look shit up and I was still really disgusted even after I realized it was probably on point.  Because there are still so many things left unexplained.  Like, how do her friends fit into all of this?  If she’s always really been dead at the time of arrival, are they all dead, too?  Are they even her friends or are they just in hell as well?  Do they even exist at all or are they just in her mind?  And why does she have to kill them for the loop to start over?  What does the ship have anything to do with anything?  Why doesn’t the loop just start over after she crashes the car?  IT DOESN’T MAKE ANY GOD-FORSAKEN SENSE!!!!!!!!

Please comment if you have any theories of your own.  Or if you want to explain the sense it may have made to me.  Cause this is all I have.  And it’s a mess.  But I will admit that the acting was fine for as nonsensical as it was and the effects were also good.

So, we gave it a 10/100.  And we can not recommend this movie in all good conscience, but if you’ve seen it, I am interested in your thoughts.

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Published by TaraRomero

I suppose I could list my favorite movies here, but instead I'll give you a strange glimpse into what makes me TaraRomero. 1. I met George Romero. He was the kindest and sweetest man. He talked to me for longer than he should have with the line getting longer. He also held my hand. And when he noticed the ladybug I have tattooed on my wrist, he said he liked it and asked me it's name. Till then, it had not had a name. Now, I call him George. 2. I love stickers. All stickers. I just adore them. I even ask for stickers for Christmas! As a matter of fact, the birthday that just past, every member of my immediate family gave me sticker packs as gifts. Affordable and extremely appreciated. 3. I have never put much stock in astrology or horoscopes, but I LOVE the magic of the MBTI. Omg. I am an INFP and it actually sounds just like me. Introverted mostly. Creative always. Heart before head and not the most logical. Totally me! For better or worse. 4. It's no surprise I count horror so high up on the list of things that make me, me. However, it's so within my soul that I was part of the Horror Club in college. Interesting bunch. And even took a Horror Lit class as an elective. I got an A. 5. Coffee always makes me happy. Always. I'm particularly fond of caramel macchiatos. But I'll drink black coffee if it's the only thing available. 6. I hate shock for the sake of shock and endings that depress me. I always mention the movies Within (2016) and the Eli Roth produced, written and starred in, Aftershock (2012), as proof of this distate I have. I abhor the idea that just because I like horror, some people think I'd actually praise a movie that lets you think the "Final Girl" just made it through the night, only to slap her in the face with a tsunami. 7. We are big time animal people. I mean, if I could, I'd have an elephant, a bear, a zebra, a penguin, an otter and a meerkat, living with me. Seriously though. We have 2 dogs right now and 2 cats. Both cats we picked up when they each came to our front door hungry. And both dogs we got from 2 different sets of neighbors. Both who, unfortunately, don't know how to care for pets long-term. But they're happy and healthy now!! 8. Revisiting my love of horror, one of the above cats, my cat, is a little black guy named Church. Because Pet Sematary. His middle name is even Pascow. To give credit where credit's due, the name was DJ's idea. But he loves horror too! 9. I'm big into art. Along with movie posters and an Anne Frank quote, I have some actual paintings on my wall. I really think Dali paints beautifully when he wants to. And if I don't get to see Michaelangelo's Pieta in person some day, I will be very disappointed. 10. Lastly, I find Emily Dickinson's poetry intriguing. I took an elective course about her as well. But do you know I injected horror even there? I was given a poem to dissect and I picked one on death, of course. Then, I researched old "Death Photos" and even printed out copies for everyone in the class. They were so interested in looking at them that it stopped them from all looking at me, and I was able to deal quite well with my stage fright. Haha

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