Directed by Anthony DiBlasi. Written by Laura Brennan. Starring Heather Morris, Perez Hilton, Ryan Doom, Chad Addison, Tess Chistiansen, Marci Miller, Tatum Miranda, Johnny Ramey, Skylar Vallo and Jake Busey.
Plot: a group of former classmates gather for a party the night before their 10-year reunion and start getting picked off in a manner befitting their yearbook superlatives.
Very first thing that happens in this movie is that someone shows up and gets killed. Then, the rest of the group show up and wonder where she went to. But they get comfy anyway and start talking about old times. Turns out that they teased this kid, John, pretty mercilessly back in the day. Well, you and I know that’s ALWAYS a recipe for disaster, but they all pretend it isn’t. Until they find the first body.
Everyone is so stupid though. They, of course, split up. It’s kind of realistic though. I mean, they start fighting amongst themselves and accusing each other of murder and other things. It’s also hysterical in a way. And I don’t even love him IRL, but Perez Hilton made the movie. Fucking funny, let me tell you.
Parts work and other parts don’t. Like, where were the boobs? Too many chances for them to have had none in the movie. However, it was a decent enough flick. At least for me. DJ doesn’t really recommend it, but I say “give it a go!”
I suppose I could list my favorite movies here, but instead I'll give you a strange glimpse into what makes me TaraRomero.
1. I met George Romero. He was the kindest and sweetest man. He talked to me for longer than he should have with the line getting longer. He also held my hand. And when he noticed the ladybug I have tattooed on my wrist, he said he liked it and asked me it's name. Till then, it had not had a name. Now, I call him George.
2. I love stickers. All stickers. I just adore them. I even ask for stickers for Christmas! As a matter of fact, the birthday that just past, every member of my immediate family gave me sticker packs as gifts. Affordable and extremely appreciated.
3. I have never put much stock in astrology or horoscopes, but I LOVE the magic of the MBTI. Omg. I am an INFP and it actually sounds just like me. Introverted mostly. Creative always. Heart before head and not the most logical. Totally me! For better or worse.
4. It's no surprise I count horror so high up on the list of things that make me, me. However, it's so within my soul that I was part of the Horror Club in college. Interesting bunch. And even took a Horror Lit class as an elective. I got an A.
5. Coffee always makes me happy. Always. I'm particularly fond of caramel macchiatos. But I'll drink black coffee if it's the only thing available.
6. I hate shock for the sake of shock and endings that depress me. I always mention the movies Within (2016) and the Eli Roth produced, written and starred in, Aftershock (2012), as proof of this distate I have. I abhor the idea that just because I like horror, some people think I'd actually praise a movie that lets you think the "Final Girl" just made it through the night, only to slap her in the face with a tsunami.
7. We are big time animal people. I mean, if I could, I'd have an elephant, a bear, a zebra, a penguin, an otter and a meerkat, living with me. Seriously though. We have 2 dogs right now and 2 cats. Both cats we picked up when they each came to our front door hungry. And both dogs we got from 2 different sets of neighbors. Both who, unfortunately, don't know how to care for pets long-term. But they're happy and healthy now!!
8. Revisiting my love of horror, one of the above cats, my cat, is a little black guy named Church. Because Pet Sematary. His middle name is even Pascow. To give credit where credit's due, the name was DJ's idea. But he loves horror too!
9. I'm big into art. Along with movie posters and an Anne Frank quote, I have some actual paintings on my wall. I really think Dali paints beautifully when he wants to. And if I don't get to see Michaelangelo's Pieta in person some day, I will be very disappointed.
10. Lastly, I find Emily Dickinson's poetry intriguing. I took an elective course about her as well. But do you know I injected horror even there? I was given a poem to dissect and I picked one on death, of course. Then, I researched old "Death Photos" and even printed out copies for everyone in the class. They were so interested in looking at them that it stopped them from all looking at me, and I was able to deal quite well with my stage fright. Haha
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