Directed by Adam Mason. Written by Scott Barkan and Gregg Zehentner. Starring Keir O’Donnell, Hayes MacArthur, Jessica McNamee, Charles Halford and John Marshall Jones.
Plot: a man and his sister endure a long night of scary practical jokes at a secluded motel.
What can I say about this movie? It was the best! No, wait, I’m just fucking with you. It was god awful.
On April Fool’s Day (sorry, we’re a little late), a man and his sister end up at this secluded motel where the hotel manager keeps pranking them. He “jokes” about money, sends the brother a dick pic and of course, he starts to scare them. But is it real? How much of a monster can he really be? Well, apparently, he can be a huge one if the circumstances are correct.
The brother is an internet troll and I suppose they could have done more with that, but they don’t really. The hotel manager, who isn’t really the manager, is a psychopath, plain and simple. There’s no under-layers to him. No figuring him out. He’s flat as cardboard. They both are. Then, the sister shows up just in time to get scared, assaulted and then murdered even though she’s the only terribly innocent one in the film.
It was so fucking stupid. It really was. It was unrealistic, too. The cop comes and is killed and no other cops show up when he doesn’t return?? Not gonna happen. And at the end it’s revealed that everyone thinks the brother was the murdered the whole time. Umm, hello! It’s called forensics. They would’ve figured it all out.
The acting was fine and the effects were good. For that, and nothing else, it gets points. We were so disappointed overall though, that we’re not even sure we’re gonna give this Into the Dark series anymore chances to toy with us.
I suppose I could list my favorite movies here, but instead I'll give you a strange glimpse into what makes me TaraRomero.
1. I met George Romero. He was the kindest and sweetest man. He talked to me for longer than he should have with the line getting longer. He also held my hand. And when he noticed the ladybug I have tattooed on my wrist, he said he liked it and asked me it's name. Till then, it had not had a name. Now, I call him George.
2. I love stickers. All stickers. I just adore them. I even ask for stickers for Christmas! As a matter of fact, the birthday that just past, every member of my immediate family gave me sticker packs as gifts. Affordable and extremely appreciated.
3. I have never put much stock in astrology or horoscopes, but I LOVE the magic of the MBTI. Omg. I am an INFP and it actually sounds just like me. Introverted mostly. Creative always. Heart before head and not the most logical. Totally me! For better or worse.
4. It's no surprise I count horror so high up on the list of things that make me, me. However, it's so within my soul that I was part of the Horror Club in college. Interesting bunch. And even took a Horror Lit class as an elective. I got an A.
5. Coffee always makes me happy. Always. I'm particularly fond of caramel macchiatos. But I'll drink black coffee if it's the only thing available.
6. I hate shock for the sake of shock and endings that depress me. I always mention the movies Within (2016) and the Eli Roth produced, written and starred in, Aftershock (2012), as proof of this distate I have. I abhor the idea that just because I like horror, some people think I'd actually praise a movie that lets you think the "Final Girl" just made it through the night, only to slap her in the face with a tsunami.
7. We are big time animal people. I mean, if I could, I'd have an elephant, a bear, a zebra, a penguin, an otter and a meerkat, living with me. Seriously though. We have 2 dogs right now and 2 cats. Both cats we picked up when they each came to our front door hungry. And both dogs we got from 2 different sets of neighbors. Both who, unfortunately, don't know how to care for pets long-term. But they're happy and healthy now!!
8. Revisiting my love of horror, one of the above cats, my cat, is a little black guy named Church. Because Pet Sematary. His middle name is even Pascow. To give credit where credit's due, the name was DJ's idea. But he loves horror too!
9. I'm big into art. Along with movie posters and an Anne Frank quote, I have some actual paintings on my wall. I really think Dali paints beautifully when he wants to. And if I don't get to see Michaelangelo's Pieta in person some day, I will be very disappointed.
10. Lastly, I find Emily Dickinson's poetry intriguing. I took an elective course about her as well. But do you know I injected horror even there? I was given a poem to dissect and I picked one on death, of course. Then, I researched old "Death Photos" and even printed out copies for everyone in the class. They were so interested in looking at them that it stopped them from all looking at me, and I was able to deal quite well with my stage fright. Haha
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